A Brief Relief?

I saw a doctor and got temporary psych med prescriptions. I’m waiting for them to be ready. That should bring some relief by tonight. This doctor wanted me to alter an existing appointment, I forget why, so I go back Friday to see the kind, understanding, pretty doctor (locum) again. My regular doc is back soon, so she’ll be gone. 

Today’s doc was naturopathic and suggested cranio-sacral therapy (?) for PTSD in Wallingford. I’ll look it up. She says they found a way to get Medicaid to cover it. She also wants to believe my toe numbness is due to high blood sugar, but I’m seeing diabetics online who have the same side effect from the med I take and say it goes away as soon as they switch meds, so I want to try an alternative. I’ll try to do the intake for longer term psychiatry tomorrow. 

A small present I got myself arrived, so hopefully I can get the broadcast TV channels well and watch Jeopardy regularly. 

I got an email blast from a temp agency I worked for years ago, seeking an executive assistant. They’re interviewing me Monday morning. I expect absolutely nothing out of this. They treated me pretty badly in 2012-13 after I did a great job for them in 2011. I mentioned the idea of unionizing temp workers, and they banned me from their Facebook page. It rubs me the wrong way that they’re even open on MLK Day, let alone having people interview then. 

I emailed a bunch of information to the community mental health ombudsman, and he claims interest in helping but won’t deal over email. I’ve emailed and left phone messages for Larry Gossett about a few things, but the man never answers. I’m ready to vote for someone who responds to constituents, rare as that is. 

So call this all cautiously relieved. Never count your chickens before they’ve hatched.

UPDATE: Two meds filled, one not ready until tomorrow.

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Gratuitous Torture by Valley Cities

After all this hassle, countless phone calls, voice mails, dead ends, being referred to the wrong people some of whom are out indefinitely, getting sent to voice mail boxes that were full, getting their nighttime message during the day, two weeks of medication withdrawal,messages not being returned, and more I can’t remember offhand; I finally am told that intake appointments aren’t scheduled at all. They’re on a walk-in basis weekdays 8:30-2. I can’t make it today, but that sure would have been helpful to know THREE FUCKING WEEKS AGO! ~€^}{]|<:5(;( 😡😡😡😩😩😡😡😡😩😡😡😡😩😩😡😩😩😩😩😩😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡😡

No Heat Twice in a Month

Lisa,
We have a problem. Twice in the past month, my apartment has lost heat. Both times, I called DCI and filed a complaint. The first time, I never heard back from them, and my landlord, SHA, took five days to fix it despite the legally required 48 hour response time. They acted very non-chalant about it, saying it could take much longer, and there was nothing anyone could do about it, so I should just be patient. The second time, when I told SHA, I warned them that they faced citation and/or fine if they didn’t fix it in 48 hours. I didn’t hear back from DCI for five days. This time, SHA found the ability to fix the heat in 48 hours. 

But in neither case did DCI even inspect my apartment. In neither case did they respond within the 48 hour limit. They never contacted SHA, so the 48 hour clock never started ticking. Had I not gotten lucky, there would have been no enforcement of the law whatsoever. 

I fully expect my heat to go out again this winter because SHA is cheap and values nothing less than their disabled, impoverished tenants. I highly doubt they fixed the heat any more than necessary to keep it running a couple more weeks. I shouldn’t have to take my chances with DCI. They are not doing their job or enforcing the law. With no enforcement, tenants don’t really have any rights. And I’m one of the lucky ones whose native language is English, who can write articulately, who doesn’t have to worry about deportation, who knows my rights, who has professional experience working in housing and homelessness, and who can make savvy decisions about what scares landlords into following the law. This is totally unacceptable and even immoral. Please help. 

What tenants really need is the no-brainer right to repair and deduct. It works, and it gives renters some agency over their own living situation.

[Written to Seattle Councilwoman Lisa Herbold, Chair of the housing committee and huge help to tenants in her district or not; my own Councilman Bruce Harrell couldn’t care less]

Parade of Crippling Misery Continues

1/2) I went to the dentist today. For some reason, they split checkups from cleanings, so I have to go back for the latter. They said I need a new crown. Medicaid won’t cover it (nor did federal employee coverage in 2003). The sticker price is $1100, and they have sliding scale fees for which I made an eligibility appointment, but the discount tops out at 50%.
I asked how long a crown should last, and they stuck with “for life if it’s done well”. I gently pushed for a clearer answer, saying there must be statistics on median, average, etc; and they said 15 years. That’s about what I remember being told before. My crown is only 9; I got it in 2008. It’s also either the 7th or 10th one I got on this tooth from 2003-08; they just never stay on, and when moving or switching dentists for insurance reasons, I always have to start from scratch convincing them that I need a gold crown. No other material (all cheaper, of course) stays on.
Gold crowns have other advantages, but I only care about the practical health aspects–I’m not into precious metals or jewelry at all, as I think they suspect sometimes. My only jewelry is a used watch I got for $20. The only other gold I own is a French coin my uncle gave me for my Bar Mitzvah.
The dentist was good about reasonably going over the risks and situation, acknowledging that it’s not urgent but should be done in the next 2 years. At some point, pulling the tooth and ending the root canal/crown drama enters as an alternative. I’ve always wondered about that, because it would be cheaper, less painful, and done forever after one procedure. It’s the very furthest molar in the back, so no one really sees it but me. It’s also my only root canal. The one other tooth I keep an eye on for a possible root canal is fine–they said it looks odd but is healthy, so that’s only cosmetic which I don’t care about. (The Baptist dentist who explained to me that a gay Barney Frank couldn’t be a real Jew made the filling way too big)
This means more hassle, physical pain, and expense. Could I get one cheaper somewhere else? UW dental school? Should I try a private dentist and pay out of pocket? How long will another crown REALLY last? The pain is bearable once every 15 years but not every 15 months. Or should I scrap all this and have the thing extracted? Even if it’s $550, how do I pay for it? Would it be worth buying my own dental insurance? Or getting it done on vacation in Europe? I feel awful saying this, but my grandpa is dying which could involve some inheritance. Should I see if my tooth can wait him out?
It’s just a thorny set of issues no one ever needs.
2/2) I walked a small, sweet dog today who I’ll call Kite. Last summer, for the first time ever, someone complained to me about a dog walking on their lawn. It wasn’t until last month that I checked the DPD website to look up her property limits so I knew where I could and couldn’t let Kite go.
Today another woman yelled at us from another house, apparently unhappy that Kite was walking on the lawn. It was a little hard to see in the rain, but I’m pretty sure she was in a different house than the one that owns the lawn we were on, as Kite regularly has enjoyed for months, both with me and her owner. This woman’s yard is inaccessible, so we’ve never been there. She was yelling at me about this lawn not being a dog walking area when IT’S NOT EVEN HER YARD.
I know where the lot lines are, because I just looked them up. Basically, all the open space short of the next driveway belongs to a house on the corner–where a dog lives. And apparently a nice couple with pre-teen kids.
I couldn’t tell exactly what this woman was saying, but I offered that I’m happy to avoid her yard if she likes (which we already do; there’s no access). If someone doesn’t want a dog on their property, that’s their right. That’s why I looked up the lot boundaries! Kite loves that space, and I didn’t want to get in trouble. I have no idea why this woman is white knighting for her neighbor.
Also, Americans are way too obsessed with their precious PROPERTY and get ridiculously rigid about it. Living beings are more important than property. If Kite were a big, loud, messy, destructive, aggressive, or even reactive dog; I’d understand. But she’s a small (cat sized), quiet, well-behaved older girl who just likes to sniff everything. She pees once in a while, and if she poops, I pick it up. Where’s the harm?
When I looked these homes up on DPD’s site, I also checked them on Zillow. My client rents a mother in law apartment allowed and approved only due to a 2009-era city ordinance. The houses around her are generally big, with very big lots, and high prices due to their good views of and proximity to Lake Washington. The house on the corner is estimated at ~$900,000. So my take is that this is a well-off, privileged white woman who has lost any perspective of what’s important in life. But with everything else I’m dealing with lately (nasty withdrawal from multiple psych meds, shoe destroyed by a dog I was sitting, first ever bite by a dog I was sitting and resulting $323 ticket, broken arm on the same side as my 2015 and 2014 injuries to the same one), and the cold and rain, I didn’t need this.
My client apologized for her neighbors but later said we’re both going to have to keep Kite off the lawn for now. That will take time for her to adjust to, and she won’t understand why. But it’s so stupid. She just likes to sniff all the stuff there, and suddenly she can’t anymore. Reason and compromise lost here. Wealth, privilege, and selfishness won. What makes you decide it’s so fucking important to keep a sweet little dog off SOMEONE ELSE’S lawn? Do you have no bigger problems in life? No higher priorities? Is this a little protest against the fact that a MIL apartment was ever allowed, where a non-rich person (special ed teacher) could move in? It reminds me of the passive-aggressive note I was left at a temp job in 2013 complaining that I didn’t correctly arrange the veggies in their free, twice-daily veggie tray. There are too many of these people, and they have too much power. Could they survive what I deal with?

Election Predictions: Initiatives

I think it’s time to make some OFFICIAL ELECTION PREDICTIONS. Washington has 6 statewide initiatives on the ballot this year. Here’s my forecast on them (bonus at the end):
 
I-732 (carbon tax)
This is pretty certain to FAIL. The left being divided is a major hit to it, and I don’t see moderate or conservative support making up for that. Taxes do best in presidential election years, and WA should easily see 80% turnout next month. There’s some chance that people who don’t know much about it might read the voter guide and think it sounds good, putting it over the top, but that’s a decidedly unlikely possibility.
 
I-735 (resolution on Citizens United)
I think this will PASS, partly because there’s little real opposition, and partly because it just doesn’t do anything–it’s symbolic.
 
I-1433 ($13.50 minimum wage/paid sick leave)
This will PASS easily. It gets at least 55%, possibly 60% or more.
 
I-1464 (public campaign financing)
This is basically I-735, but with teeth and at the state level. There doesn’t seem to be much polling on it, I haven’t heard much about it other than from its own advocates, and I suspect many people will be unsure or confused about it. Given our record as a progressive and largely good government state, and the high presidential turnout, I’m inclined to say this is slightly more likely to pass than fail. But overall, I don’t feel like I have a good read on it yet, so I’m going to hold off on making an official prediction.
 
I-1491 (extreme risk protection orders/guns)
This will PASS easily. Two public polls show it with 64% and 79% support. In 2014 (a midterm year), I-594 on background checks passed 59%-41%. The underlying issue is the same, but this presidential year favors the yes side even more. A 2:1 victory here would not be surprising.
 
I-1501 (identity theft penalties)
This, too, will PASS easily. Who doesn’t want to protect seniors from identity theft? You can quibble about what the initiative really does, but that’s how the vast majority of people will see it.
 
PREDICTION ACCOUNTABILITY:
I strongly believe in accountability for these predictions, because people need the ability to compare before and after the election, and because I find it improves my ability to make good predictions. Before the August primary, I predicted that Pramila Jayapal would win the 7th congressional district primary with at least 40% of the vote. She won with 42%. I also predicted that Seattle’s housing levy would pass with at least 65% if not 70% of the vote. It passed 72%-28%.
 
REGIONAL PROPOSITION 1/SOUND TRANSIT 3:
PASS. This horrible dumpster fire should not pass, but it will–easily. Separating what you want to happen from what appears likely to happen is important to making good predictions.
 
Stay tuned for further predictions in other races.

Angle Lake Station a Near Total Waste of Money

Go visit the 1120 “free” parking spaces you’re subsidizing! They’re a top contributor to air and water pollution and cancel out the environmental benefits of rail. This station was expedited to placate Federal Way politicians upset that their extension got delayed due to the stupid “subarea equity” policy. This station won’t have 1/3 the daily riders of UW station, thanks to it being surrounded by parking instead of homes or jobs. That also means most of the investment in trains, tracks, and the station will be wasted because it won’t collect much in fares. It will also make it harder, and take longer, to run more 3-car trains. And it totally duplicates the existing A Line. This is what the vast majority of ST3 does.

Bad Therapy & Good Gender Discussion

I remain convinced that people know what they need but are blocked from getting it. Whenever I try to discuss my lack of love life with health professionals, and often with others, they simply refuse to hear certain facts, they make false assumptions, they lay blame, they ignore facts and evidence, they suggest strategies they know have failed me, and they refuse to hear me when I repeatedly tell them exactly what I need: dating social skills for adults with autism. I sent my new therapist the CBC news clip about the UCLA training program. I explained all the relevant bits of my history I could get in and what I’ve seen on autism websites/in autism groups and what an exclusive match it is. He (I finally managed to get a male therapist, and there’s a male perspective that women just don’t get around straight dating) is still suggesting things I’ve already done, focusing on imagined issues I don’t have (e. g. shyness), suggested DBT–which is fine but hardly helps with dating, is trying to advise me about what to do on a date when the problem is that I can’t get one, is giving me insights I needed 20 years ago but already told him how I discovered myself (the long list of opportunities I would’ve availed myself of except that I had no idea at the time that they were staring me in the face), and acts like I know what to do but can’t or won’t do it. No matter how many times I come back to autism and the unwritten rules and non-verbal communication of NT culture and dating, he won’t address it. Nor will he argue against it. He just changes the subject away from it. He suggests there are different kinds of flirting, dismisses the seduction/pickup “artists” as if sex isn’t or shouldn’t be what I want (why not??), and talks about optimism and confidence–as if you just inject that from a tube you get at the store after a lifetime of being ignored, rejected, led on, abused, systematically crushed and traumatized.

Why do health professionals consistently behave this way? Ockham’s Razor rules out malice. In fact, the therapist said he thinks I’m a likeable guy and should be able to get a girlfriend (which pretty much all my therapists have said). I told him, as I have believed from observation for many, many years; that I’d make a better boyfriend than 90% of the ones out there. I constantly see women with awful men who mistreat them but fit the cultural mold better than I do. They act this way because they are totally clueless. This therapist admitted to me before that he really knew nothing about autism and would have to learn along with me. So of course he doesn’t know what the needs or available resources are–the latter because THERE ARE NO RESOURCES FOR US. But none of them want to admit this. That’s why he neither listens to me nor argues that autism isn’t the issue. They are afraid to say they don’t know and pretend the emperor wears beautiful robes (Kim Jung Un?). They are unwilling to follow the science and either say no one has figured out the answer for us, or that we have a good idea what it would be but don’t have it available. So the default plan is to waste a lot of time, money, effort, and emotional turmoil–for which the blame will all be put on the patient when it finally comes to a head–chasing whatever strategies or programs or resources they DO know about or have available, no matter how irrelevant. The idea there is to run out the clock stalling for time until something becomes available. I’m unable to go along with that.

Also today, I went to a Happiness Initiative event that turned out to be really great, and I wish I could’ve spent the whole day. There was a beautiful young woman there who said some things that positively thrilled me about the constraining, unhealthy gender roles men are forced into; the social, emotional, substance, criminal, and physical problems they cause; how both men and women feed each other to perpetuate patriarchy while both suffer from it; how it feeds rape culture; how men aren’t supposed to be or appear weak, sensitive, vulnerable, or emotional…and the woman whose presentation she was responding to had already said how men were really the key in feminism and gender equality (she’s focused on gender inequality in the home). I don’t think I’d heard women say these things since I was in college! For an amazing change of pace, I could sit back and agree instead of having to be the one issuing strategy and warnings that get me misunderstood and ostracized. (Why is there no feminist equivalent of the seduction/pickup community? How can you achieve equality between two groups of people if you don’t involve both, and how can you expect to appeal to men if you don’t also listen to and address their legitimate gender concerns?)

So this was a kind of small group training, and tomorrow is part of their conference, which I can also attend. I’m not sure whether to try to connect with this girl. 1) Chances are she’s significantly younger than I think, and 2) Basically every woman I pursue after meeting in real life turns out to be unavailable. Or 3) I get one of the standard online dating results: being ignored, rejected, or led on. But she’s on my mind as she was very pretty AND demonstrated a true understanding and fairness about gender.

UPDATE: This was a couple weeks ago. I gleaned the beautiful young feminist’s email from a group message we all got after the training. From that I quickly learned that she is about 26 and got married last year. And has cats. 🙂 Egged on by a couple friends, I replied all to the email and expressed my enthusiasm for what she and another woman had said. But contrary to my friends’ predictions, I never heard from her–in the group or individually. So it’s a good thing I didn’t try to flirt with or date her. She is still beautiful.